As the preeminent Spider-Man expert working for this website, I take it upon myself to draft a response to the leaked new season of “Marvel Snap.” It’s Spider-Verse themed, it comes out in November, and is not related to the current filming of the upcoming “Spider-Man: Brand New Day.”
Is that a mistake? No, not at all. In fact, I really like most of the new characters coming as new cards for the season pass! Here’s the [not official but pretty much confirmed] data mined set:
- Spider-Punk
- Spider-Man Noir
- Ezekiel Sims
- Hydro-Man
- Chameleon
- The Prowler
- The Superior Spider-Man
- Man-Spider
- Web Sling
Not a bad set, but I think they can do better. Like, was anyone out there screaming for Hydro-Man to be included over more famous C-tier villains? So let me put together a massive, sweeping and very overwhelming comprehensive list of Spider-affiliated New Yorkers to include instead.
Or in the future, to coincide with the movie Tom Holland is shooting as I write this. That releases July 31, 2026 (barring any delays) so they have time to listen to my thoughts and respond with feedback!
Another Spider-Man season, maybe for “Spider-Man: Brand New Day”
Regular Humans — There aren’t a ton of street level schmos in “Snap” despite how important they are to both the comics and live action fare. Even including Peter Parker as an alternate to Spider-Man would be a welcome addition since we already have both a Hulk and a Bruce Banner.
And there isn’t a more vital crew than the people in Peter’s inner circle. I’d love to see Uncle Ben (already a card) be joined by Aunt May, Mary Jane Watson, Norman and Harry Osbourne, and Flash Thompson.
Good Guys — Some other Spider-folk, some of whom appeared in the animated films, would fit perfect aside the upcoming Spider-Punk and Spider-Man Noir (played by Academy Award winning actors Daniel Kaluuya and Nic Cage, respectively). Firestar, Red Sonja, Night Monkey, and Spider-Man India would all make for an excellent additional season to the game. And, yes, there are like dozens of these alternate reality Spider-people, there’s a never ending amount of them.
Bad Guys — Oh, man, are there so many good ones to pick from. The Smythe Family aka the Spider-Slayers, Spot, The Tinkerer, Doctor Octavia, and Tombstone. And those are just the semi-famous ones!
Obscure D-Tier Bad Guys — Here are the fun ones. The real bottom of the barrel shit that I would kill for. The most ridiculous ’60s creations from Stan Lee, Jack Kirby, and Steve Ditko — animals turned into bank robbers, and just straight up mistakes. I’m talkin’ Big Wheel, Kangaroo, the Crime Master, Silvermane, Gibbon, Vermin, and Grizzly.
The Goblins — And of course, there is an entire repertoire of Goblins to pick from. Proto-Goblin, the Goblin Queen, Red Goblin, Gold Goblin, and the Goblin Force. That last one is like the Phoenix Force but much dumber.
The Sinister Six or Sixteen — In an ever increasing and nonstop end to up the ante on defeating Spider-Man, up to 16 villains would team up just to battle Peter to no avail. And most of them would be complete no names, like 8-Ball, the Mirage (not the X-Men one), Overdrive, the Scorcher, the Speed Demon, and the Living Brain.
God damn, do most of those bad guys suck, but, boy, do I enjoy the hell out of all of them anyways. Please bring all of them to “Marvel Snap” so I can stop complaining.
Image credit: Sony Pictures and Marvel Entertainment
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